I have heard you calling in the night.....

I got an early Christmas present from Santa- a bring-you-to-your-knees cold. I was deep in the throes of it this past Monday but had a commitment to teach my final regular KY class for 2019 that evening. Also, 3 dear souls had put time and effort in to bring us live music for the class and I did not wish to let them down. I literally exited my bed, got ready and trundled into the car. Truthfully, I was having quite the pity party.....without going into too many details, the Life-road has been rough throughout this entire year and I was doing the classic ‘pile on’ of all my woes atop this really not feeling physically well enough to leave my bed. 

So what happens? Not two minutes after we’d left the house (Hubs driving thankfully) two batshit crazy deer made an apparent beeline for my car. The result was a cracked headlight, fender and bashed in driver’s door and side panel. There were unpleasant reverberations of the May accident for me, in which my car was totaled. 

At the end, we were unharmed and this was not a given. It could have been much worse, as there was another car heading toward us. If it had been even a few seconds difference and the deer had run in front of that oncoming car first, and it had it swerved......well, you can imagine.

Since our car appeared to stay driveable, we continued on. When we arrived, Hubs had to climb over the passenger seat to get out since the driver’s door was smooshed shut. That’s only fun when you are a little kid! 
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Class was delivered, very sweetly to us all- I had to just get out of the way. The three beloveds sang beautifully and those few souls who made it to the studio in the midst of the Christmas-busy, were I think, given the opportunity to delve deep and then rest and leave uplifted.
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After we were done, Santa Rosa Maria came up to me and shared a recent story she’d heard. It centered on a priest who was complaining extensively to God. At the end of his tirade, he heard God say only this: “My child”. And without thought, he answered ‘Yes, my Lord’. 

In these two Divine words, all of the love and compassion in the world is felt. And also an invitation to go beyond the commotion of the mind as it agitates about life’s dramas. An invitation to come to the moment, in silence, and see the Holiness present in all things, always. (My Teacher’s words: ‘If you cannot see God in all, you cannot see God at all’ came right to mind here). In the priest’s answer: an affirmation that the soul instinctively Knows its Source, its SatNam, and that only love is real. 5 simple words in an exchange: the entire mystery of the universe revealed. 

It was no actual ‘accident’ that I came to teach this class, this day- I knew with certainty that this story was given to Rose, of course, for her..... but also for her to ‘hand-deliver’ to me. By no coincidence, my entire class, before hearing this story, had as its focus, the soul saying yes. (Thank you, Santa Rosa. Thanks to The One who has seen fit to share you with me). 

So, as I leave this decade, one of the things I am being called to witness is the heart of me which is ready and willing to vibrate a resounding ‘Yes!’, and act in accordance with this. BUT for only the right reason: that I am (as is each of us) a beloved child of God, answering His call. All is according to His Will alone: the ups and downs, the good, the bad and the ugly. ​

May we leave behind the rumination of all that we will never understand; may we give to others the love and compassion we did not receive; may we show up for those who don’t show up for us; may we vow to be authentic even when its so much easier to hide behind the masks we have so carefully constructed; may we each do ‘our thing’ joyfully and devoid of comparative envy; may we hold ourselves and others in an unlimited compassion; may we say ‘Yes’ to the Divine who is constantly calling us Home to our True Self. 

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